In your efforts to let a man know you’re interested in him, you might actually be blocking his ability to get close to you.Find out why, and what you can do instead so that he naturally feels the urge to move the relationship forward.As a result, I changed my career direction to find more satisfaction in that part of my life; I focused on building stronger friendships that were most meaningful to me and I separated from people who were unhealthy for me; I tried to focus on building stronger relationships with my family; I chased down and felt the comfort of financial stability; I adopted a dog; and ultimately I felt quite a lot of joy.
Unfortunately, what often ends up happening is that we like a man so much – and want to make sure he knows we’re interested – that we inadvertently push into him rather than create the space where he feels pulled toward us.
To create that all-important space, you’ll need to shift from a mindset of “doing” to one of simply “being.” You’re going to go against your usual impulse to make something happen with a man and instead allow things to unfold – which will naturally shift him into the doing role.
I leaned in toward my friend to listen as she spoke.
Her face was downcast and her eyes moist as she recounted the events of the previous week: “I’m not sure what happened, but he said we needed to take a break. He needs time to make sure he is following God’s will.
Sharon Hodde Miller is a writer and a doctoral student at Trinity Evangelical Divinity School.
Before beginning her Ph D in Educational Studies, Sharon earned her Master of Divinity from Duke Divinity ...He doesn’t want us to have any contact for a month.” Just like that, my friend was sent into a tailspin. And why had God communicated something so different to him than He had to her?She hadn’t seen it coming, and neither of us knew what it meant. As difficult as my friend’s experience was, her story is not unique in the Church.Ultimately, this book transformed the way I look at my own choices and actions.It led me to really question my actions and my motives to see if they were in line with what would bring me the most joy and long-term happiness.This is what we think of as “the chase.” And men enjoy the chase.