(Are there things you keep secret from your partner? (Are there times you dread spending time with your partner?) You freely give your time, energy and attention to your friends. )We should be giving our relationship partners the same kind of support we give our friends. in Psychology Today, in order for a relationship to be successful, there must be a balance between two very different concepts that reflect both the friendship and passionate parts of a relationship.
Researchers have demonstrated that that heart-pounding feeling of being in love is driven by norepinephrine, which is chemically related to adrenaline.
Researchers have pinned down the chemicals that flow in our brains and bodies when we have that rush of romantic excitement. A psychologist in York, England, had subjects who were complete strangers follow this protocol: They told each other intimate details of their lives for half an hour and then were directed to stare into each other’s eyes for another four minutes without speaking.
You don’t need to choose if you are going to be friends Women have a far easier time deciding who they want to be just friends with and who they would pursue a romantic relationship with, but men tend to group all women together on the ‘potentially romantic’ side, and then just decide their order of desirability.
For this reason, I also believe men try to actually building a friendship with a woman because he doesn’t want to find himself plunging into the dreaded friend zone, and suddenly be seen more as a brother than a potential boyfriend.
Dopamine, found in the brains of people who are addicted, is also involved. The level found in lovers is the same as that found in people experiencing obsessive compulsion.
No wonder partners both obsess about the loved one and idealize the person. I’m saying I’ve got the secret for having your cake and eating it, too.
We rarely criticize our friends or put them down in public, and we often take our time to listen to them and understand their perspective, even if we think they’re wrong. The likeability factor is derived from catering to each other’s wants and needs just out of kindness or thoughtfulness, which increases someone’s platonic feelings toward another person.
It would make sense, then, that the person for whom you already do all of these things would make the best relationship partner. The desirability factor is derived from the absence of those things, which ferments that kind of desire that reflects the old adage, “You want what you can’t have.”If one of these is more present than the other in the relationship, the relationship will fail.
In fact, the chemistry mimics the high of addiction.
Your brain chemistry is actually different when you fall in love than all the rest of your life.
This may sound old-fashioned, but I believe it not for the sake of tradition, which of necessity comes and goes, but because it is biblical.