Rather, they are attracted to somebody who will neglect the relationship.
For more insight into the subject, we turned to an expert: Pia Mellody, Senior Clinical Advisor for The Meadows and Clinical Consultant for Mellody House and Dakota, who traces the origins of love addiction to early childhood trauma caused by neglect or abandonment.
The very promises that the addict makes to avoid triggering the obsession can themselves serve as a trigger. If his object of choice is another person, he may cruise the singles bars.
If he is hooked primarily on novels or movies, he will often go through rather elaborate rituals of selecting just the right book or video, setting the scene with music and dim lighting, and so on.
The individual is consumed by thoughts of romantic intrigue.
An episode of obsessive thinking can be triggered by almost anything: meeting an attractive person; passing someone on the street; seeing a picture on a billboard; experiencing an emotional low point of self-pity or depression; even passing through a location where the obsession was triggered on a prior occasion. Inevitably he begins to seek out something or someone that will satisfy that drive.
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LOVE ADDICTION HELP focuses on helping love addicts recover, heal, and overcome love addiction; healing from obsessive love; overcoming relationship dependency; and create healthy, happy relationships.
It’s her go-to coping mechanism whenever she’s feeling blue.
Some people have a glass (or a bottle) of wine; Mary has romance.
Usually, they are so unhappy that the relationship affects their health, spirit and emotional well being. They do not want to hurt or abandon their partners.
Mary rushes away from her desk at work, eager to get home so she can check her e Harmony and profiles.
This means that from a place of insecurity and low self-esteem, they try desperately to hold on to the people they are addicted to using codependent behavior.