I was surprised but thrilled when I saw her name flash onto my screen. By the third time we met, however, I simply found her too alluring to resist. What I found irresistible was the way she came across as prim and proper, but also delightfully naughty at the same time.
In a subsequent flirty email she boldly suggested that I cook her a meal at my Wimbledon flat some time. I loved the shy, almost disbelieving smile when I paid her compliments. I adored how she smelled and the look she had when her seriousness descended into playfulness I consoled myself that at least she hadn’t thrown them away. I didn’t want to share Lauren, even with her husband of 12 years. The lone diner on the next table was no longer a private investigator.
We live in a day and age where dating has become one of America’s favorite past-times.
So the married woman/single man coupling is the more rare circumstance. Why do some single men have affairs with married women? Unlike most women, single men often love having access to someone who is passionate, sexual and really wants nothing more from them. The goal of dating for married people is far different from dating among the singles. This is the most apparent reason why they willingly throw themselves out there.
On a purely physical level, most men are going to enjoy their affairs with married women. You’re unlocking a woman full of sexual desire who is not getting her needs met at home, so of course the one night (or many nights) of sex is going to be unbelievably great. You don’t need to meet the parents and you won’t miss a single bowling night out with your buddies. But for married people who are already committed, they are just out to seek solutions to their unmet emotional and/or sexual needs.
There are no strings attached to it, either, so it’s just fantastic sex with seemingly no consequences. Men would love to have a lover who asks almost nothing of them. This especially applies to married women who date single guys. He’s not going to fall in love with you and marry you.
The married woman won’t expect presents or moan if he forgets to phone her. What this means for single men is the kind of sexual trip they crave without the guilt trip in the end. Practicality and convenience play a factor in affairs for the single man. You don’t have to worry about romantic dinners, tickets to the movies, or even “waiting” for sex. Supposing you’re a single guy out for a night with your friends perhaps night-clubbing, you see an attractive woman out with her friends and you strike up a conversation. He has no intention at all of staying with you for very long.
We’re also living in a time where monogamy and the sanctity of marriage is becoming less and less recognized, and even worse, less revered.
With the advent of the Internet and technology, the married force is finding it even easier to play when the cat’s away (or simply not looking).
I thought about how many women had been in my position, waiting for a man to leave his wife.
As the lover you get the edited highlights of a marriage: the laughter, the smiles, the sex. But what we lacked was emotional closeness — that lovely sense of wasting time together and the accompanying feeling of certainty. And I’ve made myself a promise: in my next relationship, I want Sunday nights and Monday mornings together, and all the boring minutiae of daily life that couples take for granted.
Some people even hunt and seek out the married individual, thinking that dating a married woman or man will be fun.
With thrill seeking topping the lists of enjoyment in the dating world, there is nothing more exciting than dating someone with the potential of getting caught.
– Receptive – If someone just LISTENS to us – instead of just waiting for their chance to talk – we will find them attractive. They have a bottomless need to pump up their ego or their self-esteem, and getting that “fix” from sleeping with others is how they do it.